Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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