so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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