Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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