i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
