So drunk its hurt
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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