The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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