he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I AM VODKA MAN
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
