I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
