Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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