She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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