Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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