Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
