If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
