i jhust puked up my retainher.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
3pm strippers are depressing
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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