put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
