i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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