Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Randomize
