I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He did a backflip because drugs
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