i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
