The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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