im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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