I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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