dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
