So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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