Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
What a dumb baby whore.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize