windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
time to smoke my breakfast
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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