the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
