This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
and she was petting her beer can
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
