i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
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