honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
