Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
