there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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