I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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