i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Of course I have a pirate flag
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
