Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
