I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
