I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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