sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
