my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
