im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
it was like eating out sand paper
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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