He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
