i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
