whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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