no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
