I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
