6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
