I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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