exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
