We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
