Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
