i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
he laminated a picture of his dick.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
